See yourself as the success you ALREADY are
I can often get caught up in "what's next?" syndrome, staying so focused on the future and what's up ahead that right now starts to feel not quite good enough.
It's like I just have to achieve this one more thing and then I'll be totally satisfied.
But of course, the satisfaction from achieving the thing is very short lived because a new goal ultimately, always, falls into place and then suddenly, I feel behind again. Inadequate.
When does the sense of accomplishment and success come in?
I'm all for planning and aiming for particular goals, but so much of my identity has been wrapped up in achievement since I was a child, that I started to realize every time I attained a goal, I felt good for a hot minute, but then the feeling of lack and pressure to get more done would inevitably take over again.
It started to be the only thing I could really feel anymore, despite how "successful" I appeared to be by typical definition- more clients and money than I'd ever had, feeling like an integral part of a flourishing community, more opportunities pouring in than I could ever take- I felt like nothing was ever enough.
Like I still wasn't good ENOUGH.
Still had so far to go til I got "there".
So much pressure to keep it all going, and no time to enjoy the benefits of creating so much success.
That's what happens when our sense of fulfillment becomes wrapped up in attainment- the "if I just do this thing/am in that place/act this way/have this happen, then I'll be happy" treadmill becomes miles and miles long, and we never feel quite happy with where we're presently at.
One way to hop off that treadmill of conditional happiness is to celebrate your accomplishments!
I did this recently myself, taking a cue from the so so smart Christine Kane (if you're not reading her blog yet, check it out- you'll love it) to simply list out 100 accomplishments in my life.
You write down 100 things you've created, made happen, achieved, rocked at, are proud of.
Think big and small, from kiddom til now, anything that comes to mind.
And then (this might be the trickiest part) you actually give yourself an opportunity to take that all in.
Take a moment to acknowledge yourself- all that you've already done and who you already are.
Yes, 100 things! It sounds like a lot, but you can take a few days to do it, adding to the list as you think of things. And when you do get to 100 (I bet you could even think of more! I did!) and let yourself actually celebrate all those things, damn if it don't feel good!
And that's what it's all about really- feeling good.
Feeling satisfied with our lives.
Feeling like we matter, like we make a difference.
Feeling like we've found our place in the world.
Feeling happy, right where we're at.
So, instead of beginning your journey from a place of lack, and "I'm not enough", imagine if you moved forward, towards those goals and big dreams from a place of "look at all I've done?"
Imagine if you moved forward fully knowing what you are indeed capable of?
I think it'd be a lot easier to create the life you truly want with that kind of powerful energy behind it!
If there's anything I really hope to achieve now, it's to come away from behind the binoculars that are always focused on my goals, and instead remember to look around to see what's right in front of me- the happiness, and accomplishment, and all the reasons to celebrate that are right here, right where I'm at.